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Thorns & Light

Find Healing

Choosing a therapist

What to look for, what to ask, and why fit matters more than any single credential.

Finding the right therapist can take more than one try, and that is normal, not a sign therapy won't work for you. This page offers general orientation, not a referral or endorsement of any individual provider.

What to look for

A license appropriate to your state or country (in the U.S., look for LCSW, LPC, LMFT, PsyD, or PhD, among others) and experience specifically with trauma. Trauma-focused approaches with strong evidence include EMDR, Cognitive Processing Therapy, and trauma-focused CBT: you can ask directly whether a therapist practices these.

If your faith matters to you, you can ask whether a therapist is comfortable incorporating it, or whether they would refer spiritual questions to clergy or a spiritual director. Neither approach is wrong: what matters is that you feel respected either way.

Questions worth asking in a first call

"What is your experience working with survivors of abuse?" "What approach do you use, and why?" "How do you handle it if I need to pause or say something is too much?" A good therapist will answer these without defensiveness.

Cost and access

Many therapists offer sliding-scale fees; community mental health centers and some Catholic Charities affiliates offer low-cost counseling. SAMHSA's helpline can connect you to low-cost options in your area.

Common misconceptions

If the first therapist didn't help, therapy isn't for you.
Fit between client and therapist is one of the strongest predictors of whether therapy helps: trying a different therapist is a normal, often necessary step, not a failure.

Questions people are often afraid to ask

Practical next steps

  • · Call SAMHSA's National Helpline for a free, confidential referral to low-cost options in your area.
  • · It is reasonable to interview more than one therapist before committing.